“Exceptional, Personalized Care”
As an experienced Toronto Couples Therapist I would like to help you understand the complexity of relationships. A relationship develops over time and is influenced by each partner’s values, interests, life experiences, and cultural, religious, educational or family backgrounds and individual preferences. Each partner’s expectation of what the relationship should be, and the roles each should play within it, is a significant influence.
Often people may be unaware of some of their expectations until they are disappointed or a conflict arises in the relationship. Often this occurs when the couple begins to see each other more frequently, live together, marry, have children or one or both face significant life stress. As time goes on partners may be astounded to discover that some of their expectations of life as a couple are so far apart. Individuals start to see another side of the person they love under various conditions.
All relationships tend to encounter problems during stressful periods and at different stages. Others may find that they are continually unhappy with their relationship. Sometimes one partner feels frustrated and misunderstood while his or her mate is totally unaware of the situation.
Couples Therapy Toronto
Many couples only consider therapy as a last resort. It may however, be helpful at any time, and sometimes seeking therapy soon after problems surface prevents a buildup of frustration and disappointment.
The aim of relationship therapy is not only to help the couple deal appropriately with immediate problems, but also to achieve better ways of relating in general. Couple therapy focuses on the problems existing in the relationship between two people. But, these relationship problems always involve individual symptoms and problems, as well as the relationship conflicts. For example, if you are constantly arguing with your spouse, you will probably also be chronically anxious, angry or depressed (or all three). Or, if you have difficulty controlling your temper, you will have more arguments with your partner.
In relationship therapy one identifies the conflict issues within the relationship, and decides what changes are needed to feel satisfied within the relationship. Couple therapy involves learning how to communicate more effectively, and how to listen more closely. Couples must learn how to avoid competing with each other, and need to identify common life goals and how to share responsibilities within their relationship.
Toronto Relationship Break-up Therapy
Relationship break-ups are not easy. Whether or not you are the one who made the decision to break-up, the ending of being with someone you love is painful. When an individual is dating, in a relationship, living with someone, married, married with children, the termination of something that has defined you for months or years is devastating. You realize that you have been robbed of a future with the other person you love. Feelings of loss, hopelessness, panic, and a host of other emotions are expected.
From the time we are born, we characterize ourselves in terms of a relationship. Relationships bring security, love, support, and meaning to our lives. We become very attached to those we love, be it family members, friends, pets, and the person we have chosen to be with. The loss of a loved one through a break-up or divorce affects one’s life dramatically. If the break-up is unforeseen even more distress and confusion can be experienced.
Psychotherapy can help you by assisting you to process what has occurred. When we, as human beings, experience something traumatic those events needed to get converted into “processed memories” so as to not to affect future functioning and behaviours. You will also need to re-identify yourself as a single person.
There are many symptoms you may experience post break-up or divorce. Some physical symptoms may include insomnia, poor appetite, agitation, irritability, restlessness, confusion, loneliness, and the list goes on. One may find they have difficulty making decisions and that their level of self-care has diminished. One may find that they have no interest in activities that previously were enjoyable. You may find it problematic to work and focus. Your mind may be continually wandering to the relationship and why it had to end. You may be unnecessarily blaming yourself for the outcome.
You may suffer with depression, anger, fear, confusion, hopelessness, helplessness, and loneliness, etc. Therapy is most helpful when someone is in the process of re-identifying oneself after being coupled. There are so many memories, so much pain. One needs to be able to freely discharge emotions to be able to process them. Distracting yourself and getting busy will not help you process this traumatic event as it will only delay it.
As you work through your feelings and thoughts, and re-identify yourself you will slowly start to regain your life. Having a caring trained professional, like myself, will make the healing process much easier and quicker. Psychotherapy will also assist in preventing interference of this event with future romantic relationships as you do not want to carry fears and mistrust into future relationships.